Through My Eyes

Some people say I talk too much, that I always have a story to tell. I don't know what's round the corner so my blog is about life through my eyes and making every day count.

Archive for the month “October, 2013”

Music can define my mood

When someone is asked what sort of music they like the normal answer is well a bit of rock and maybe pop or classical for example. With me i can honestly say i like any sort of music there is except for one genre which is heavy metal as its a bit loud and shouty for me and i struggle to see the talent involved in making that noise!
Music does amaze me, when you actually think about it, people putting together noises by way of instruments or computers, adding a bit of singing (or not in some cases) and they have a few minutes of sound that can not only make them millons of pounds but also change peoples moods, change an enviroment in a room, bring people together and tear them apart!
For me i have an ipod full of many sorts of tunes all played at different times and in different situations. I like classical and find it relaxing but dont have a lot of it on my ipod. I love a bit of rock music, especially rock classics, best played when i am driving. I also have a lot of dance music which is always played if getting ready for a night out or for the gym to motivate me to work harder! Then there is the power ballads, perfect for when im in a more meaningfull sort of mood, chilling at home and feeling a bit sorry for myself. Everyone loves a cry to a good old tear Jerker song (or is that just me!) I could be driving along in the car in a brilliant mood rocking out and then the next soung could be a tear jerker and then i will automatically start thinking of awful depressing things, feel really sorry for myself and start crying! (i maybe need a therapist!)
Music can really define my mood just by a change of a song.
It may sound strange but i hate silence, I find silence a little scary. There billions of different noises in the world that can be made all day every day so for there to be moments of silence is a little scary to me. If there is silence i will either fill it with my voice or where possible put music on!
If asked of one thing the world couldnt live without i would have to say music! Obviously the answers people would immediatley say would be food, water money, economy, politics, law etc etc but all that aside i think music is accountable for a lot more that people realise! Without music there would be no tv talent shows, no record labels, a huge gap in entertainment not to mention what nightclubs and bars would do, they would be out of business! There would be no concerts, no soundtracks to films or tv programmes and a huge gap in life!
people would be in bad moods all the time from driving in silence to work not to mention not having a first dance at a wedding! Then there’s the need to play depressing music at Funerals, as if the loss of a loved on isn’t sad enough people feel the need to add a power ballad to the service just to make sure anyone not crying cries!!
Music can make people smile, cry, dance, sing, laugh and i think its a very powerful thing that i know i couldnt live without!!
If I was stranded on a desert island I would be happy if I had my Solar Powered Radio to hand!
As I write this blog I have my music on, the song at the moment is called Skinny Love by Birdie. Brilliant song.

Private Healthcare or NHS?!

I would say the start of all my health issues was April 2013, from that point when I had my first GP appointment till now seems to have been a long & stressful time and yet I’m nowhere even near the light at the end of the tunnel!

My first frustration was that the cancer cells were only discovered as a result of a separate operation that i had actually been advised not to have but pushed for it.
This left me thinking what would have happened if I had not pushed for this operation? I would have not known I had this condition till it was too late maybe!

From the point I actually got the diagnoses of DCIS and told I needed a mastectomy I started doing research on the Internet. The option of going private was always in my mind as I want the best care, surgery and results. But then I thought no, I work hard and pay my taxes and expect a decent surgeon and operation on the NHS.
One think I did do though was refer myself to another hospital an hour away as this had a specialised cancer centre.

So my first appointment with this expert surgeon was yesterday at but I didn’t get seen till 2.45. Now I appreciate there can be delays but sat on a chair waiting for nearly 4 hours was a nightmare!
Then when I saw this surgeon he wanted to do more tests as there were some key tests hadn’t been done before diagnosing me and telling me I needed this operation. So why has it taken 6 months of appointments and waiting around to now be told I need more tests as some have not been done! And it’s not like I have a cold here or a migraine!
To me this is 6 months spent making errors when I could have started treatment for what could be a life threatening disease!
I am still continuing with the NHS as things seem to be moving quicker one but has still left me wondering if going private would have been the way forward to get things done properly and a lot quicker!!
What annoys me the most is when I have googled DCIS it shows a list of symptoms, I had all of these which is why I first went to my GP. Knowing my symptoms were a big sign of cancer I would have expected a mammogram but only got an ultrasound scan which does not actually show cancer. As a result of that I got told I had inflamed ducts and to leave it for 3 months and to return if it was no better! So I had cancer in me for 3 months, possibly growing and getting worse and the hospital missed this and sent me home for 3 months! Just makes you wonder what we pay our taxes for!!

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