Through My Eyes

Some people say I talk too much, that I always have a story to tell. I don't know what's round the corner so my blog is about life through my eyes and making every day count.

Archive for the month “September, 2013”

The waiting game

So my next appointment with the consultant is the 2nd October, 3 days from now. I am hoping at this point I will find out a date for my operation. I have come to terms with the fact i need this operation but waiting around for a date is driving me insane. I feel like I’m wasting time waiting and just want my operation now, the sooner I have the operation the sooner I can recover.
In the mean time I am trying to fill my weekends with great things to distract me but it’s not really working at all bad time is not flying at all but in actual fact going at a very slow rate at least it feels that way!
So Megan had her first karting race in the new junior league she has joined, nearly finished with a 3rd place but got spun out and came 4th, but got driver of the day! Not bad for a 9 year old girl racing and the only girl! A good distraction from everything else going on.
Hopefully the next 2 days will fly by and by Wednesday night I will know when I am having my operation! Hopefully soon! ­čÖé

Stress!

Stress is a strange thing and presents itself in many different ways. I think the word stress is overused, you hear so many people say how stressed they are and how things have stressed them out but are they actually stressed or just using that word to describe emotions such as annoyance or frustration at something.
The strange thing is that I don’t actually feel stressed. My mood is generally a good mood and if anyone asks about my operation and recent diagnosis then I don’t crumble and get upset but am quite happy to talk about it almost as if I’m talking about what I’m having for tea or how racing went at the weekend! Everyone keeps asking how I am and won’t believe me when I keep saying fine but the truth is I actually feel fine!

I always imagined being stressed would mean being unhappy all the time but it seems that’s not the case. my mind is saying I’m fine and my body shouting the opposite! My appetite has gone and has been replaced with a slightly sickly┬áfeeling. I feel so tired by about 8pm when normally I don’t sleep till after midnight! To add to that I’m completely over emotional and everything seems like such a big deal!! ┬áI find myself crying at random tv adverts and getting sniffly at Coronation Street! So maybe I am a bit stressed about my upcoming operation, I don’t have a date yet so I suppose that isn’t helping not knowing when. Hopefully it will be soon as I am not getting any better sat around waiting! Got another consultation next week so will hopefully know more then!

Start of my blog!

So here we are! I have never written a blog before but I am going to have a go! May be of no interest to anyone but think I will enjoy doing it and so thought I would make a start!!

so I’m sat wondering where to start… My life is very hectic and always has been but that’s how I like it! so a basic rundown of the last 5 years I have gone from a super skinny grid girl/brolly dolly in the British superbikes where appearance┬áis everything to a not so skinny autograss racer getting covered in mud every weekend!! Besides starting Autograss racing i have spent years supporting my husband in his bike racing and now spend my weekends taking my 9 year old daughter Kart racing so the love for racing has passed down the generations! Along with that I work full-time, study a diploma at home online and try and raise money for various charities close to my heart.

I am very much a person that does not like change, I get in a routine and like it. Take me out my comfort zone and I worry a lot, stress myself out and am not happy! With this is mind it was a big shock and a worry to be diagnosed with a condition called DCIS this year, this is a non invasive form of Breast cancer meaning it can’t spread (yet) but needs to be removed. Since then the Diagnosis changed to grade 1 invasive Breast Cancer so a lot to deal with.
I will go into that at a later date I think but as you can imagine this took me right out my comfort zone and to a certain degree brought my fantastic hectic life to an abrupt standstill!

i think that’s enough for my first post before I get carried away but will end by saying To be cont…

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